Monday, March 31, 2008

The Monday after

Yes, I agree with everyone saying that Davidson vs. Kansas was the most exciting game of the weekend.

Yes, I agree with everyone that having 4 #1 seeds in the Final Four makes for a memorable and justifiable tournament.

Lets get on with the news, shall we?

Wake Forest recruit practices his drive-by skills before the 2008-2009 season.

One of the most highly regarded recruits to ever sign a letter of intent to play basketball for Wake Forest was arrested Friday night by the Gwinnett County Sheriff’s deputies on charges of assault and trespassing.

Al-Farouq Aminu, a 6-8 Parade All-America from Norcross High School in suburban Atlanta, was accused of shooting an unnamed female with a BB gun from inside a vehicle...

Shit, that ho probably owed him money. She's lucky he is still a BB gun "apprentice" and not a glock wielding graduate from the school of thuggery. For some reason the song "Still D.R.E." is playing in my head.

Yeah! That's how we roll in... Winston-Salem?

Next up, the brave Derrick Rose is like a little bitch around needles.

Rose came stalking out of the locker room, yelling, ranting and on the verge of tears. He only calmed down when team officials agreed to glue the cut and forget the stitches.

"I'm terrified of needles," he said. "If I would have got stitches, they would have had to stick a needle right above my eye. So I was pouting, stormed out of the locker room. I was mad."

Oh, this phobia has a very strong history the Memphis player...

When he was 7, he fell off his bicycle and another child ran over his head with a bike, causing a large wound on the back of his head.

"The nurses at the hospital were holding him down and he was so scared he broke away from them and got up," his mother, Brenda Rose, said in a phone interview. "So they had to tape him to the gurney and do the stitches.

Wow! I think UCLA just found a way to get into his head this coming Saturday. All the Bruins students should bring syringes. Start waving them around whenever Rose goes to the free throw line.

That would be HI-larious.

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Final Four updated brackets

Here is where we stand going into the Final Four:

Not so bad. Kansas survived Davidson, which was no small feat.

I smell fear

I think there might have been a bit of confusion with the Davidson students...

Actually you are at a basketball... Eh, nevermind. Maybe that is why you lost today.

And could someone tell me why Davidson's hottest shooter, Stephen Curry gave the ball up down two with just 5 seconds left in the game?!

And he gave it to a piss poor 3 point shooter to boot! Aye!

If you are not watching the Davidson / Kansas game...

...turn to it NOW. Either online at CBS Sportsline or on the tele. This has devolved into a street fight and it is only 4 minutes into the first half! Jeez, bodies are hitting the floor.

And Memphis, we have underestimated you. Congrats and welcome to the Final Four.


First... I hate to sound like a broken record a broken record, but I'm still stuck on yesterday.

(HT: With Leather)

Second, our updated bracket...

Third... Off topic, but Jeez Louise. If this is how we are raising our children then we are in a shitstorm of karmic trouble. When I saw this it just took my breath away. I just hope it is isolated to the southern region of the country (whom I affectionately call the "write off" district).

It's ok. When we get older we'll get impregnated by Black men and then give our babies up for adoption to Gay couples.

Friday, March 28, 2008

I was wroooooooooong.....

From a post earlier today: "In other news, Davidson to pay travel, lodging and tickets for 300 students to see their school get ass-raped by Wisconsin tonight."

As Jeremy Davies said in Solaris: "Yeah......."

Davidson does a Sparta on Wisconsin, winning by 73 to 56.


Oh well. Why do you still listen to me?

Brak brak brackets!

Updated bracket...

No comments right now. Just embarrassment.

Afternoon delight

Can we review that Xavier / West Virginia game again?


*scratches head*


*tries to compose self*


I was actually babysitting for a friend during that game. When baby "Madness", who is a Musketeers fan saw Raymond's shot...

Hey, gimme a light will ya? That ends that. Game over.

In other news, Davidson to pay travel, lodging and tickets for 300 students to see their school get ass-raped by Wisconsin tonight.

"The response was tremendous and frankly, surprisingly large," school spokeswoman Stacey Schmeidel said Thursday. "We actually have a lot more students who want to go, but we're trying to find more buses."

Yeah, I'm pretty sure the same type of sentiment existed by the gringos on the day before the Battle of San Antonio de BĂ©xar.

Is The Masters really a tradition unlike any other?

After tonight's games...

Well one Catholic survives tonight. We'll see about the other one Friday.

And the Hilltoppers really tried to make a game of it. We were somewhat rooting for them even though it would have virtually destroyed our bracket.

And for tonight's entertainment, Eastern Washington's basketball game gets Rick Rolled!

Never gonna give you up, baby...

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Over 100 e-mails so far!!!

That is how our workday has been going. Which has been prohibitive to our true love, talking with nameless, faceless internet people who stumble upon our corner of the world.

So just a quick update for now, and maybe some more tonight depending on how the games go.

Schedule -

7:10 pm
7 West Virginia
3 Xavier

7:27 pm
4 Washington State
1 North Carolina

9:40 pm
12 Western Ky.

9:57 pm
3 Louisville
2 Tennessee

File this under "This game brought to you by Nytol":

Louisville / Tennessee... Feel the excitement as two equally matched teams fight for mediocrity.

As for the rest of the games?

Did we put this here because there will be blood? No. Because it's all about DRRRRRRAAAAAAAINAGE!?!?! Nope. Because it's all about who's straw will drink who's milkshake from acrrrrooossss the room.


And finally, another coach goes down as Ben Braun gets his golden ass booted from Cal.

Ok, that could be considered DRRRRRRAAAAAAAINAGE!!!!

Wednesday, March 26, 2008


Play "The Sting" theme music here...


This from USA Today: Most seasoned college hoops refs conspicuously absent from tournament.

Among the officials affected was Jim Burr, who has worked 16 Final Fours, including 14 of the previous 18, and seven finals. Burr attributed his exclusion to "an administrative mix-up" over whether he completed one of the three requirements.

Bernard Clinton, who works in the Atlantic Coast Conference, also was affected, says John Clougherty, the ACC's coordinator of men's basketball officials. Clougherty adds he appealed to the NCAA, "but it didn't go anywhere." (emphasis mine)

Enter Paul Newman chomping on a cigar...

Without specifying why, Greg Shaheen, the NCAA senior vice president who oversees the event, says "a handful" of tournament-worthy refs were excluded.

Ummmmm, sure.... The refs also claimed that they sent in documents and now the NCAA have basically said "No you haven't."

I'll leave the conclusions up to you all.

Oh, and you can file this under "No shit": University of Florida students love to get drunk after games.

The weird thing about this story is the police basically tell you where they will set up checkpoints. Kinda defeats the purpose IMO.

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... The West Fuckin Virginia Stretch!

My oh my.

Marketing meets practicality

This weekend as we move into the regional rounds I am going to meet up with some friends to watch the games. Yes, I watched the opening rounds at home with Mrs. March to Madness. Who is not a college hoops fan to say the least (she planned a family barbecue on Upset Sunday for the love of Pete!!!!).

Anyways... When some of the boys asked where should we go, I had a suggestion -

Yup, Outback Steakhouse baby. Why? Because they are doing a March Madness promo where they are giving out Bloomin’ Onions and NCAA commemorative glasses. Why not merge my need to get the hell out of the house with Outback's marketing?

I never had once of those fried onion treats, so it should be interesting.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

The body of Christ compels you

What does Washington State, Oklahoma, North Carolina, Davidson, Stanford, Miami and Western Kentucky all have in common?

They all hate Roman Catholics.

What is intriguing is that in a tournament whose opening rounds featured a large number of upsets, the three biggest upsets were pulled off by Catholic college teams. Villanova, Siena, and San Diego all began their runs by outscoring teams seeded much higher. Of course, Catholic teams were on the losing end of such surprises, as in the case of the early exits of Gonzaga, Georgetown and Notre Dame from their regional brackets.

The article goes on to show their absolute disain for Davidson...

If Villanova somehow slips past Kansas, it doesn’t get much better: They will play the winner of the #3 Wisconsin vs. #10 Davidson (as in Catholic-killer Davidson).

Catholic Online is not a website to be trifled with! They pull no punches on this obvious war against their religion. They do make final predictions on the last two schools (Villanova and Xavier). The recommend prayer and lots of it facing Kansas and West Virginia.


Those Spartans know how to celebrate...

East Lansing to put more police on the streets in anticipation of the Michigan State/Memphis game.

East Lansing police say this past weekend's game went off without any problems, but the department will be calling in extra patrols Friday night...


And damn the NCAA rules about showing highlights! This newscaster has a way around that...


Do you think is was just by coincidence that Duke was represented by a Barbie doll?

Monday, March 24, 2008

And also...

I thought this quote from fellow blogger The Bracket Board kinda summed up how I feel sometimes with people coming up to me asking how to fill out their brackets...

Finally, the real downer comes with hearing the entire world talk about this bracketed national title like it simply plowed into the earth after being launched from some distant planet. NOW people are talking about basketball, and most are unaware of the paths that most of these teams had to navigate to get here. It gets reduced to a name on a seed line, and in a lot of cases, teams full of players who will someday be your hometowns' dentists, lawyers, business owners, doctors, teachers, wildlife officers, etc., are seen as warm-up fodder for the teams with big names, big alumni bases, big dollars, big conferences, big exposure, and players who will earn big NBA paychecks. It saddens me to some degree.

Amen, brother.

We have a blog?

Wow. Just wow. We totally forgot to post today. Almost forgot. And it wasn't even crazy with work or real life.

We just plum forgot. Like forgetting your wife's birthday or something. Not intended, but it happens, right?

Here is our updated bracket through Sunday:

Sunday's games were pretty much predictable. We're still in it, but barely.

I promise substantial posts come tomorrow.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Bracket update and Tori

Not a good day for us yesterday. Don't get us wrong, the games were super cool. But not our picks. So, we've enlisted Ms. Amos to sing an appropriate tune to represent how we are looking today...

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Duke, the bracket killer

We didn't have Duke in as a National Champ. But we had Duke going far. They seemed to be on fire throughout the season. But they also seemed to have a late collapse. Then going in the tournament they almost get beat by Belmont, and now fall to West Fuckin Virginia.

Oh well. Not like Coach K has to worry about his job. But still. I'm not mad, I'm just shocked that I was so wrong about them.

Brackets, bitches...

Updated Official March to Madness bracket with games from Friday:

The Drake loss hurts, but not by much (only Sweet 16 damage). And once again how awesome are USD and Western Kentucky! When they play each other, they might spontaneously combust.

They were the first school I wanted to go to

The University of San Diego. A nice, quiet, small Catholic university...



USD beats UConn with last second shot.

Friday, March 21, 2008

A simple token


This... Is... SPARTA!!!!!

Congrats to the Hilltoppers!!!!

And here is BONUS coverage -

(HT: The Sporting News)

Updated bracket and failed liveblog

First, this is where we are at:

Not too shabby. We shall see what transpires today.

Next, we have to admit that we failed you. Yesterday we planned to do a liveblog of the first round. And we did, yet it was a little below our standards. And our standards are low to begin with, so lets just say it was shitty.

Between the myriad of technical problems we were encountering with the CoveritLive platform and this:

A sub-par event was created. Apologies to all. We want to do a makeup liveblog but we have to see when we can squeeze it in.

Other than that, enjoy you Friday!

Oh wait, conference root time. Congrats to UNLV for that pounding they gave Kent State!!!!!! Next stop, Kansas. *sigh*

Thursday, March 20, 2008

2 pm today! Liveblogging - NCAA First Round

Just add lots and lots of booze...

Epilogue: San Diego State's season

(Scene opens - SDSU head coach Steve Fisher thinks he is sitting in an empty visitor's locker room while his team practices out on the court in preparation for their NIT game with Florida)

Coach Fisher: *sigh* (shakes head then buries his face in his hands) "We're gonna get our ass kicked."
SDSU Player: "Coach?!"
Fisher: (startled that anyone else is around) "Yes?! What are you doing in here?"
Player: "I was just coming to get my jacket. Ummmm, you know it just sounded like you said..."
Fisher: (interrupting) "That we were gonna kick some ass!!!!"
Player: "Oh! Yeah coach! I feel it, we are gonna be on fire tonight!!!"
Fisher: "Good! Now get back out there!"
Player: "YEEEEAAAAAH!!!!" (runs out of locker room)
Fisher: *sigh* (hangs head)

(Lights slowly dim to pitch dark. Scene closes)

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Sit right back and we'll tell a tale

A tale of UNLV's win over BYU in the Mountain West Conference championship. But not the fierce 76 to 61 victory by the Runnin' Rebels. No, we want to bring up the fan fight that happened afterward! least one Cougar fan's face was bloodied in the melees, and the wife of BYU's Lee Cummard was seen grabbing the shirts of two UNLV fans trying to run onto the floor. Several witnesses also said they saw Sarah Cummard throw punches.

..."Shame on UNLV fans." (Lee Cummard said).

...rivals lashed out at those around them, and angry fans spilled over chairs, down stairs and onto the floor. Several security guards appeared to be attacked, as well.

I told you Mormons were straight gangstas.

Brave Salt Lake City Tribune photographer Chris Detrick and reporter Rhiannon Potkey narrate this sad sorted photo essay about what happened. For shame.

Excuse me....


Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... That's what friends are for

About the only time this season you don't want someone with "good" hands

Cheesecake analysis

Can't get enough hot bimbo action in your college hoops talk? Well March to Madness is here to help you, friend! Behold our bevy of babes...

Here we have Kristen helping you break down the Midwest Region -

And we have Lorraine helping you understand the drrrty South Region -

Finally we have Rachael going through the West Region -

The East Region is still being worked on (because it is so damn hard for these chicks to dissect). When it is done, we'll post it.

Now who loves you, and who do you love?!?!

Eternal optimism

Check out this poor Oklahoma blogger that is holding on to the chance that OU will go deep in the tournament...

I’m a loyal Sooner basketball fan, but even I thought the chances of OU winning the men’s NCAA basketball tournament this year was between zero and none. Yet, after reading this, I’m a little ashamed of my self.

"This" meaning the Vegas odds of the Sooners winning at 10,000 to 1.

Dream, the impossible dream... Now you know since I said it, they will run deep.

What a whore...

Have you ever wondered "What are the presidential candidates picking for the NCAA Tournament?"

"Who does Hillary Clinton have winning that Notre Dame/George Mason game?"

"Wonder what teams Barack Obama has going to the Elite 8 round?"

"What does John McCain's bracket look like?"

Yes. Senator and Republican presidential candidate John Sidney McCain III has a March Madness bracket that he would like to show the world. While he also tries to convince Americans that he is the best candidate for president in the middle of two wars and a recession.

Hell, if his picks are correct, do you think undecided voters will think "Wow, he picked the National Champ! That is exactly the type of quality I look for in the leader of the free world!"

So show your patriotism and sign up for McCain's bracket!

That's right, bitches...

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Do you have time for this?

Here is a listing of all the games for Thursday and Friday along with who will be calling them. All times are EST. On CBS. You knew THAT, right?

Thursday -

12:20 - (12) Temple vs. (5) Michigan State (Gus Johnson and Len Elmore)
12:20 - (14) Georgia vs. (3) Xavier (Craig Bolerjack and Bob Wenzel)
12:25 - (16) Portland State vs. (1) Kansas (Kevin Harlan and Dan Bonner)
2:30 - (11) Kentucky vs. (6) Marquette (Dick Enberg, Carter Blackburn, Jay Bilas)
2:50 - (11) Baylor vs. (6) Purdue (Craig Bolerjack and Bob Wenzel)
2:55 - (9) Kent State vs. (8) UNLV (Kevin Harlan and Dan Bonner)
3:00 - (13) Oral Roberts vs. (4) Pittsburgh (Gus Johnson and Len Elmore)
4:55 PM - (14) Cornell vs. (3) Stanford (Dick Enberg, Carter Blackburn, Jay Bilas)
7:10 - (11) Kansas State vs. (6) USC (Kevin Harlan and Dan Bonner)
7:10 - (15) Belmont vs. (2) Duke (Craig Bolerjack and Bob Wenzel)
7:20 - (13) Winthrop vs. (4) Washington State (Gus Johnson and Len Elmore)
7:25 - (9) Texas A&M vs. (8) BYU (Dick Enberg/Carter Blackburn, Jay Bilas)
9:40 - (14) Cal State Fullerton vs. (3) Wisconsin (Kevin Harlan and Dan Bonner)
9:50 - (12) George Mason vs. (5) Notre Dame (Gus Johnson and Len Elmore)
9:50 - (16) Mississippi Valley State vs. (1) UCLA (Dick Enberg, Carter Blackburn, Jay Bilas)
9:50 - (10) Arizona vs. (7) West Virginia (Craig Bolerjack and Bob Wenzel

Friday -

12:15 - (15) American vs. (2) Tennessee (Verne Lundquist and Bill Raftery)
12:25 - (10) Davidson vs. (7) Gonzaga (Jim Nantz and Billy Packer)
12:30 - (10) St. Mary’s vs. (7) Miami (Ian Eagle and Jim Spanarkel)
12:30 - (12) Western Kentucky vs. (5) Drake (Tim Brando and Mike Gminski)
2:45 - (10) South Alabama vs. (7) Butler (Verne Lundquist and Bill Raftery)
2:55 - (15) UMBC vs. (2) Georgetown (Jim Nantz and Billy Packer)
3:00 - (13) San Diego vs. (4) UConn (Tim Brando and Mike Gminski)
5:00 - (15) Austin Peay vs. (2) Texas (Ian Eagle and Jim Spanarkel)
7:10 - (16) Play-In Winner vs. (1) North Carolina (Jim Nantz and Billy Packer)
7:10 - (11) St. Joseph’s vs. (6) Oklahoma (Verne Lundquist and Bill Raftery)
7:20 - (13) Siena vs. (4) Vanderbilt (Tim Brando and Mike Gminski)
7:25 - (9) Oregon vs. (8) Mississippi State (Ian Eagle and Jim Spanarkel)
9:50 - (9) Arkansas vs. (8) Indiana (Jim Nantz and Billy Packer)
9:50 - (14) Boise State vs. (3) Louisville (Verne Lundquist and Bill Raftery)
9:50 - (12) Villanova vs. (5) Clemson (Tim Brando and Mike Gminski)
9:55 - (16) UT Arlington vs. (1) Memphis (Ian Eagle and Jim Spanarkel)

(Major HT to my main man: College Hoops Journal)

You go now!

It's the time between the end of the conference tourneys and the beginning of March Madness. The 3 day lull that gives ADs a chance to exact revenge...

It's firing season!

TCU coach Neil Dougherty? Your time is up.

Toledo's Stan Joplin? Your pink slip has been delivered.

Tim Welsh of Providence? Dunkin' Donuts is hiring:

Rice's longtime coach Willis Wilson? Your services are no longer needed.

Idaho's George Pfeifer, you are the weakest link. Goodbye!

Ahhhhh, I love the smell of charred jobs in the morning. Smells like, failure...

Also, the hype is already beginning for the Beasley Mayo show this coming Thursday.

Monday, March 17, 2008

Wow, Donovan is pissed...

Florida is the defending National Champ and are back to back NCAA Tournament winners.

This year they failed to even get IN to the tournament.

And Billy Donovan is beyond angry. Conniption fit would more accurately describe it.

Coach Billy Donovan, feeling like his players had settled into a state of complacency and entitlement, banned them from Florida's $12 million facility. He also told them they couldn't wear any Florida attire.

The Gators... found themselves fighting to get back into... the team locker room, the practice court, the video room, the weight room...

Donovan was also contemplating releasing a pack of rabid dogs to disembowel his players heartless carcases, but decided against it for insurance reasons.

Better luck next time, big guy.

Official March to Madness Bracket

After 10 minutes 2 hours of deliberation, we have finally come up with our predictions. Read it and weep!

Comments - The East region was by far the hardest region to fill out. All those teams have a legitimate shot at getting to the Elite 8. The West was probably the easiest.

Bracket updates of course will be done throughout the tournament.

Oh yeah, you have spoken and we have responded! If you are looking for a printable bracket for the 2008 tournament go here. If you are looking for a bracket manager go here.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Bob Knight needs a nap

Bob Knight asleep at the wheel on LIVE television.

Yawning... Disoriented... Asking for help from Digger Phelps...

Selection Show live (kind of)

This is where I will be talking about the picks for March Madness. When it happens.

Right now I'm cooking my famous spicy red beans and rice chicken thighs. I should come up with a better name.

Be back at 3 pm.

3 pm: And here we go....

UNC, Memphis, Kansas and UCLA as number ones... No surprises there.

On the live feeds into the different team, Xavier is sitting there like "Fuck you, where did you place us." Confidence.

That is crap... Mt. St. Mary's has to do a play in. Indiana is playing Arkansas? That is gonna be a slaughter.

Bye bye American U. They play Tennessee.

Boise State? Where did they come from? 14th seed.

There is not gonna be a 16th seed beating a #1 seed this year!!!

Conference root! UNLV AT #8!!!!!!!!


Hey, my wife's undergrad school Cal State Fullerton is in. But playing Wisconsin. They are not good to me (the Badgers), but they are unfortunately better than Fullerton.

USC against Kansas State. It's gonna be Mayo versus Beasley!!!! That should be good.

Almost All these 16th seeds are here for the first time. I feel bad for them.

I was wrong... Miami is in.

Conference root! BYU also as a #8!!!!!

MUST SEE GAME! West Virginia vs. Arizona!

A nod to blogger and WKU alum, The Bracket Board. Good luck!

Ok, I'm out. We will probably publish our bracket either tonight or tomorrow.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

What would cheerleaders do with no fans?

Because of that Atlanta storm, the SEC tournament was moved to the tiny Alexander Memorial Coliseum at Georgia Tech.

And because of THAT, the SEC and the NCAA has banned ticket holding fans from watching the games.

(Let's read their minds, shall we?)

First girl from left: This is sooooooo lame.
2nd girl from left: I need a nap.
3rd girl from left: Go Bulldogs... Yeah... Go...
4th girl from left: Did Bobby call me yet? My boyfriend is the best. I'm in love.
5th girl from left: Mmmmmmm, wonder if Bobby has woken up yet. Last night was so good.

Hooray for the little guy

Congratulations to American University and welcome to the party.

A-U! A-U! A-U! A-U!

Friday, March 14, 2008

NCAA shows disdain for Drake students

Congratulations Drake University on making it to March Madness this year! You haven't been to the NCAA Tournament since 1971. What are you gonna do now?

Plead with the NCAA to give us more freakin' tickets!!!!

When pairings are announced on Sunday, Drake will only receive 350-550 tickets —regardless of the site.

Members of Drake’s Champions Club (multi-year, $5,000 and up donors) have the right of first refusal on four tickets each. Drake says there are 40 members of that group, meaning 160 tickets could be requested.

About 100 tickets will be held for families of players and coaches, another 55 for Drake students and others will go to selected university administration and families (emphasis mine).

So lets get this straight. Approximately 84% to 90% of the Bulldogs tickets will go to faculty and staff, fat cat donors and the team's families while the STUDENTS who supported this team through the famine years get almost nothing?

Wait, it gets better...

Drake men’s basketball fans likely will have better chances to purchase tickets directly at the NCAA Tournament venues than through the university, officials said today.

As of Thursday nearly all the sites are sold out.

Yes, I believe... you have been SCREWED!

Thursday, March 13, 2008

What happened?!

Again with the damn refs, Arizona State gets bad call and loses to USC.

Bye bye Sun Devils.

Dear Lord...

So, ummmm... You probably heard of Master P's son, Lil' Romeo. If not, here is a quick primer.

Average rapper just like his dad. Average basketball player just like his dad. Average actor just like his dad. Honestly I didn't even know his dad was even on that Nickelodeon show.

Anyways, Master P met with USC's Tim Floyd to talk about his son and show him this video:

Coach Floyd was so blown away, he signed the high school senior to a full basketball scholarship!!!

...Romeo is not a good player at Beverly Hills High School, is too short, doesn't play much and has a bum leg.

Success for Floyd meant giving him a scholarship.

Or could it be that Floyd's other superstar recruit DeMar DeRozan who CAN play is BFF with Romeo?

Floyd denies that, saying Romeo's friendship with DeRozan was ''not a factor at all'' in his interest in the rapper.

Both scholarships were announced, according to the Wall Street Journal, at a news conference at the Four Seasons Hotel, arranged by Master P's PR firm.


OMFG!!!11!! We're gonna be Trojans!!!!

(Major HT: Fan IQ)

Real life meets blog life

I'm just a man with a dream of enjoying every bit of college basketball possible. Don't expect in-depth analysis or picks. I just do color commentary on the wonderful thing that is the Madness of NCAA Men's Basketball.

The above is from my online profile. Pretty self explanatory. And that is not just my opinion on the internets, it is my opinion IRL. Ask me which college hoops player was arrested recently for what? I got your story. Ask me which b-ball boy was suspended for what and for how long? Got you covered. Ask me which NCAA coach got their ass kicked by a raccoon over the weekend? Check.

Ask me if your team will win that crucial game? Nope. Can't help you. I'm actually 0 for 2 in that department. But it never fails around this time at work I have scores of people coming up to me asking a) how to fill out their bracket, b) will their team make it to the Elite 8, c) does their 16 seed team have a shot against the #1 seed, d) will their team win that bubble game to get in March Madness...

Stop the insanity!!!!

This year I'm telling everyone and their mother to go here for nice and soothing March Madness picks. These wise Oracles will have every answer to your questions, grasshopper. Go there now. You may end up wiser and fatter for it. Now leave me alone. I was in the middle of a triple chocolate sundae.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Excuse our mess

If you haven't already notice, we have included an interactive scoreboard widget from ESPN. Check it out, it will be very handy once the madness starts.

Also, we will be liveblogging the opening round of March Madness on the 20th. We will start at 2 pm (already tipsy) and try to continue as long as we can (I'm guessing three hours with the amount of booze we will consume). We won't be doing one game in particular but a whole range of games, whatever catches our eye. Hooray for live internet feeds of the games we want to watch.

Finally we now have growing corporate sponsorship. So check that out and consume for daddy.

All these items can be found on the left hand side of our site. Have fun!

To the left to the left...

Week Eighteen Blogpoll

Here is the official consensus top 25 blogpoll -

A tribute to Drake who we left for dead last week (with Spanish sub-titles). Viva la Bulldogs de la Norte!

1) North Carolina
2) Memphis
4) Tennessee
5) Kansas
6) Texas
7) Duke
8) Georgetown
9) Wisconsin
10) Xavier
11) Louisville
12) Stanford
13) Notre Dame
14) UConn
15) Butler
16) Drake
17) Purdue
18) Washington St.
19) Vanderbilt
20) Michigan St.
21) Marquette
22) Indiana
23) Davidson
24) Clemson
25) USC

Everyone's vote can be found here.

Comments - We are reaching the home stretch now with just two more blogpolls to go (one for next week and one for the end of the NCAA Tournament). You know USC reminds me of one of those floating buoys in the ocean. One week they are out of the poll, the next week they are in.

In other news, who can resist a college hoops mascot fight! (HT: Fan IQ)

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Pregnancy is hard work.

This baby needs to chill out.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Without you we're nothing...

...says UNC to Tyler Hansbrough.

North Carolina will worship retire Hansbrough's jersey as soon as he leaves!

CHAPEL HILL, N.C. (AP) - Tyler Hansbrough will soon take his place among a select group of North Carolina basketball greats.

The junior was honored as national player of the year by Sporting News on Tuesday, ensuring he will become just the eighth Tar Heel to have his number retired.

For a North Carolina men's player to have his jersey retired, he must win at least one of six national player of the year awards: The Associated Press, the U.S. Basketball Writers Association, the National Association of Basketball Coaches, Sporting News, the Wooden Award and the Naismith Award.

LSU gets desperate and contacts Tim Floyd about the job?!

Sources told the paper Floyd did not express interest in LSU, but he is a natural candidate for the job because he was living in Louisiana when USC hired him in 2005. Floyd is close with John Brady, who was fired by LSU in February, and said he would not want to follow him. But LSU remains interested, sources said.

Sure, you may say that when Jesus O.J. Mayo leaves for the sucktastic NBA, Floyd will have little talent and LSU may look attractive. But wow, this school fucking treats their coaches like shit. Why would you want to subject yourself to that?

Portrait of a man getting fucked over...

Monday, March 10, 2008

Well then, it makes sense now!

Here is a UCLA homer's response to this.

Geez Louise...

(HT: Thirtyfive Seconds)

Happy scalpers and an angry raccoon

OMFG!!!!11! Work is slow enough to allow me to do a timely Monday post!

Scalpers at George Washington University are in it for love of the job, not monetary gain.

"There's no profit in it," said WG, one of the two scalpers who would not give his full name, for fear of arrest for scalping - a crime in the District. "This place almost never sells out and tickets are only 12 bucks."

"We just do this for fun," said WG, who is currently attending nursing school. "It's just something to do. Sometimes we'll do this and then go to the games."

If only we all had jobs like that. But some say that because the Colonials currently suck, scalping tickets to sucky games just doesn't bring them in anymore.

Ron Schneeberger, a frequenter of men's basketball games, said there used to be a lot more scalpers in past years.

"When we had winning seasons and many people came to the games, we used to see many scalpers out here," Schneeberger said. "But this year I've only seen two or three at games."

Next up, pissed off raccoon dislocates Pat Summitt's shoulder.

I momentarily lost it," Summitt told WBIR-TV in Knoxville. "The raccoon was about to attack... fortunately nothing happened but a dislocated shoulder..."

"When I realized what could have happened, it almost brought me to tears," she said. "It wasn't very smart on my part."

Yeah, those Tennessee raccoons are tough. You could have almost been knocked the fuck out.

Oh, I don't want just a piece of you, Pat. I want the whole thing!!!

Oh yeah, Bruce Pearl loves Erin Andrews. A lot. (HT: NCAA BB FanHouse)

Saturday, March 8, 2008

UCLA is freakin' lucky


Exclusive crappy video with sunspot brought to you by us!

I'm not bashing the Bruins. But two games where the rules were ignored in UCLA's favor?

Friday, March 7, 2008

What's your name anway?

I'm not being bitter. I think this is well deserved. Stanford had the lead over UCLA for almost the ENTIRE GAME. Then allowed the Bruins to catch up. Then proceeded to collapse in overtime.

Tied at 63 after regulation, the Bruins dominated overtime by outscoring the Cardinal 14-4. Brook Lopez and Mitch Johnson scored Stanford's only baskets...

Stanford Cardinals, you win the Always Be Closing award!

Fuck you, that's my name!!!

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Garbage in, garbage out

Frustrated by Baylor's lack of effort against Texas A&M, Bears fans decided to throw garbage on the court yet again...

There, they're the ones that threw stuff!!!!!

WACO – With two straight home games being interrupted by debris being thrown on the court, Baylor athletic director Ian McCaw went on the offensive Thursday to try and put a stop to it.

Officials waved off the final 1.8 seconds of Texas A&M's 71-57 victory over Baylor on Wednesday night after half-full plastic soda bottles came flying onto the court. It started raining debris just after A&M's Donald Sloan threw down an emphatic dunk.

The best part is the AD is going to try to put a stop to it. As Yoda said, "Do. Or do not. There is no try." Start having security monitor the stands and start throwing out people who do that. Start making the refs issue technicals when it happens!

Eh, maybe it's all for not. With that loss, Baylor is squarely on the bubble looking like they will be left out of the madness.

Everybody hurts... sometimes.

Bettors corner - Stanford at UCLA

(Editor's note: This will be part of a limited series focusing on the betting side of NCAA basketball. I've never said that I was a pure soul and I love to venture to Vegas during March. But our lawya wants us to say "for entertainment purposes only". There, I said it. Happy?)

Stanford vs. UCLA
Pauley Pavilion, Los Angeles, CA
11:00 PM ET, Thursday, March 6 at 8 pm PST

Point spread brought to you by Bodog Sports: Stanford +9

The brothers Lopez will keep this close so the "smart" choice would be to take Stanford and the points a la Tony "Two Tone" T:

But we're not "smart". We are balls to the wall no holds barred certifiably crazy. Like a fox.

Take Stanford moneyline.

That's right, straight up.

"What?!" you may ask (or scream). UCLA at home has too much Love (as in Kevin) for the Cardinals to handle? Maybe, but hang with us for a second...

Stanford is looking to close out the season with a high seed possibility. Plus they just finished beating down Washington State and will be taking that momentum to Pauley Pavilion. What is UCLA known for? Down in the paint scoring. And you think they are gonna have their way with Stanford's presence? Not happening. UCLA really has nothing to play for at this point already locking up a 1 or 2 seed. Stanford NEEDS this win and they know it. Expect it to be close but I think the Cardinals will pull it out in the end.

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Does being under .500 make you a winner?

So, University of Detroit coach Perry Watson resigned.

"I was blessed to have the opportunity to bring excitement and winning back to Titan Territory," Watson said in a statement released by the school.

Detroit's record the past four seasons is 48-74, including 7-23 this season.


And this after the 60 to 37 schellacking the Titans received at the hands of Wright State.

Every head a planet I guess... Some people would call coach Watson a winner, some would call him a unmitigated disaster.

Week Seventeen Blogpoll

Here is the official consensus top 25 blogpoll -

When logic and proportion
Have fallen sloppy dead
And the White Knight is talking backwards
And the Red Queen's "off with her head!"

- Jefferson Airplane
White Rabbit

That pretty much sums up the blogpoll for this week...

1) North Carolina
2) Memphis
4) Tennessee
5) Kansas
6) Duke
7) Texas
8) Stanford
9) Xavier
10) Louisville
11) Wisconsin
12) Georgetown
13) UConn
14) Purdue
15) Notre Dame
16) Butler
17) Vanderbilt
18) Indiana
19) Michigan St.
20) Marquette
21) Washington St.
22) Drake
23) Clemson
24) Gonzaga
25) Mississippi St.

Everyone's vote can be found here.

Comments - Really. Check out last week's poll. A complete scramble for this week. No less than 4 teams received first place votes. Drake slammed down 9 points. 6 teams either moved down or moved up 3 or more points?!

All I can say is this will make for an interesting two weeks. Stay tuned here for another edition of Bettor's Corner tomorrow. No, it doesn't matter that I was wrong last week!

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen (special edition)

Hoosier cheerleader exemplifies the "butterface" concept...

Now brace yourself. 2nd NSFW pic behind cut.


(HT: With Leather)

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

We hate whiners too

A 27 year old man got tired of hearing an 11 year old complain about losing a basketball game. So he did what all of us would have done. He walked up to her and introduced his knuckles to her face!

The girl and her brothers had been fussing about losing a basketball game when (Johntia Luwonziea) Barnette went into the bathroom and punched her in the mouth, saying he was tired of her running her mouth...

The girl suffered a swollen and split upper lip.

We'll be back with some substantial posts come Blogpoll release tomorrow.

Monday, March 3, 2008

I'm so fustrated!

This time sickness has grabbed a hold of me and has prevented me from giving a decent post. You don't want to know the details.

But in the meantime... I don't report much (if at all) on Women's college hoops, but this was too good to pass up. (HT: Sunday Morning QB)

Michigan was leading the game by 18 points, but Wisconsin came back and end up beating them. That would be eligibility for the Always Be Closing award, however since I don't follow what the women do, I can't really give that prestigious award out.

Below is Michigan's coach after the game. Saying he was angry is like saying the Sun is kind of hot.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Saturday, March 1, 2008

Weekend update

Remember this?

(Missouri guard Stefhon) Hannah allegedly started a fight with Athena employees, and one of the employees broke Hannah's jaw. The injury sent him to the hospital in serious condition. His involvement led to his arrest and an assault charge. Sixteen days after the bar fight, Mizzou coach Mike Anderson kicked Hannah off the team.

Well it seems like Mr. Hannah is a club killer.

In the letter dated Feb. 21 to the city finance department, Athena Nightclub owner Rashid A. Kikhia "is no longer operating a night club" and is in the process of "reorganizing the business on all levels, including management, cooks, delivery drivers and servers."

Athena came under fire after an early morning fight outside the downtown bar Jan. 27 that resulted in the arrest of University of Missouri basketball players Jason Horton and Stefhon Hannah. Horton and Hannah, who police say scuffled with two Nikai employees about "poor service," later were charged with third-degree misdemeanor assault in connection with the fight. Hannah was kicked off the team. Their arraignments are scheduled Monday.

Bye bye Athena...

And finally shame on you Arizona Wildcats fans. You give a bad name to college basketball. Bastards.