Sunday, January 31, 2010

March Madness predictions

A look at the Elite Eight as predicted by ESPN:

Michigan State
Kansas State

A bit premature but why not...

USF has arrived

There was a reason why we wanted to watch the University of South Florida verses Pittsburgh. All they do is beat quality teams!

Sundays are almost as good as Saturdays.

Saturday, January 30, 2010

6th Avenue Heartache

Indiana and Illinois were tied 70 to 70 and Illinois has the ball with 4.4 seconds left.

4.4 seconds? What can you do with that?

That's what.

America, f*ck yeah!

Love him or hate him but at least our president loves some college hoops!

Home alone

Our viewing schedule:

Marquette at Connecticut - Noon
Duke at Georgetown (game of interest) - 1 pm
Indiana at Illinois - 2 pm
Vanderbilt at Kentucky (game of interest) - 4 pm
Kansas at Kansas St. (game of interest) - 7 pm

Pittsburgh at South Florida (game of interest) - 1 pm
Saint Joseph's at Duquesne - 4 pm

Mrs. March to Madness is out of town so it's just us guys here. Hit up Gabby via AIM (shoegazergabby). We all might do a chat room if needed. Let the games begin.

Friday, January 29, 2010

When alley-oops go wrong

Observed during the Texas / Texas Tech scrum:

Not shown was the announcers laughing their asses off a couple of seconds later.

Face palm

Ok, you're Wisconsin. You are ahead 57 to 56 against Purdue with only 29 seconds left in the game. What do you do? You let the Boilermakers score 4 unanswered points and lose 57 to 60.

Hurray for fail!

Thursday, January 28, 2010

The SEC is turning into the NFL

As in the No Fun League...

SEC Bylaw 10.5 – Sportsmanship
SEC Sportsmanship Policy On Access To Competition Areas

The institutions of the Southeastern Conference have approved new sportsmanship policies designed to limit access to competition areas for all sports.

The policy imposes significant institutional financial penalties for violations in the sports of football, men’s and women’s basketball, at the discretion of the commissioner. Institutional financial penalties range from:

* $5,000 for a first offense
* up to $25,000 for a second offense
* up to $50,000 for a third and subsequent offense.

Well the University of South Carolina got caught up in this mess after beating #1 ranked Kentucky. What's worse is this was their second infraction. Yup kids, reference rule above to see how much that fine was. Thank goodness the students chipped in to help defray the cost. Once again the SEC in their infinite wisdom makes a boneheaded decision.

Have you seen Banana Man?

Below is an unaltered photo from the Syracuse/Marquette game on Saturday...

We'll keep you posted on this phenomenon.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

All teams need the Downey Ball

(HT: The man, the myth, the legend, the Freek)

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Shaving

Seriously NSFW... Some might find this disturbing.

Have you ever felt that you were cursed?

What can you say? Michigan had that game. It came down to one unlucky miss by Wolverines forward DeShawn Sims with 1 second left that gave Michigan State the win, 57 to 56.

Jalen Rose was at the game and at one point he was getting congratulated by friends and fans for his team's likely "win". The next second he was all by himself...

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Let the chaos begin

And then there were none. South Carolina beats team formally known as number one 68 to 62. At this point any team in the top 10 could take it all come March.

And let the campaigning for the Jayhawks begin..


Stop fouling!

We can't figure it out, was Georgetown that bad or Syracuse that good? The Hoyas got absolutely manhandled out there losing 56 to 73. The Orange outblocked Georgetown 4 to 1. Georgetown had twice as many fouls as Syracuse. There were chunks of time where the Hoyas did not score anything because the Orange either stole or blocked the ball. Georgetown coach John Thompson III begged his team on three different occasions to stop fouling Syracuse so he could get the hell out of there quickly.

And now, a special comment from a Syracuse fan...

(HT: Troy Nunes Is An Absolute Magician)

Monday, January 25, 2010

Welcome to the minstrel show

After a few days of thinking about it (and after many drinks) this is not as bad as we first thought. But it is still embarrassing.

Introducing Minnesota coach Tubby Smith making a fool out of himself.

Good gravy, you're a man now.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Not even close

Now playing: Runaway!, staring Darius Miller and John Wall!

There's only two teams in the SEC right now.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Pay attention, Sparty

You know, on an in-bound pass you don't really need to find your fellow player to pass to. You could throw it to one of the opposing players. The trick is you gotta hope that opposing player does not catch the ball. But who would do that in a close game, right? That's suicide...

Betcha $5 that Izzo is having that Michigan State player run Pyramids drills until he pukes right now.

Enter Sandman

Against Boston College Virginia Tech was only up by 1. The Eagles had the ball with 9.2 seconds left. What could the Hokies do to get a spark going in Cassell Coliseum? To spur their team on to victory?

How about some Metallica?

Gives you chills, doesn't it? Congrats, Tech.


Minnesota thoroughly outplayed Michigan State today. The Spartans didn't even have a lead in the game until the last 2 minutes of the game. But we guess that is why MSU is ranked and the Gophers are not.

There were so many moments in this game we are going to share once we compare notes. There was Tubby embarrassing African-American men everywhere, an excellent in-bound trick play, etc.

Final score: Michigan State 65, Minnesota 64.

Hello, Kitty

Our viewing schedule:

Michigan State at Minnesota (game of interest) - Noon
Boston College at Virginia Tech - 1:30 pm
Marquette at Syracuse - 2 pm
DePaul at Notre Dame - 2 pm
Arkansas at Kentucky - 4 pm
Texas at UConn - 4 pm
Dayton at St. Joseph's - 6 pm
St. Bonaventure at Duquesne - 7 pm

Pittsburgh at Seton Hall (game of interest) - 2 pm

So take care of that morning wood and get yer game on. Oklahoma's Lesli Jones ought to do it for ya (Not Safe For Anything). That's right, we like our women voluptuous, bushy or both.

Friday, January 22, 2010

A middle finger to Pitino

Seton Hall kinda upsets Louisville 80 to 77. And once again we have a fine piece of officiating work from a Big East crew...

Doris "Violation" Burke was about ready to leap out of her ESPN chair on that one. Good job and Happy Friday.

Has there been anyone better

After UConn's female basketball team utterly and completely dismantled the Lady Blue Devils 81 to 48, and convincingly pulverizing the number two ranked team in the country 70 to 46 we were running out of superlatives to describe how amazing the Lady Huskies are. Duke coach Joanne McCallie said it's like playing a WNBA team. We think they would give the pros a run for their money.

But never fear! A gracious fan gave us the means to where we will never have to say anything about UConn again. When they play their next opponent we just need this to show what will happen:

Very very Sparta.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Darkest before the dawn

Let's face it. Kentucky, as amazing as they have been they are not UConn's female team. A couple of close scrapes. Only to be led out of the darkness by super frosh John Wall. And it just get harder from here.

Sure, the SEC is... well, the SEC. But there is one team that may give the Wildcats problems. The Volunteers by themselves are no match for Kentucky but when you add the home crowd of Thompson-Boling then things change. We have seen that with former number one Kansas.

So we are making a prediction. If Kentucky is undefeated before February 27th, then they will lose at Tennessee. Bank on it.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Oh brother

No big deal, North Carolina will be ranked 25th on Monday...

* - We like towel girls. Girls are soft. And so are towels. Perfect match.

Tiger Bait...

...or How To Successfully Execute A Screen So Your Opponent Cannot Be Found.

Observed during the Georgia Tech / Clemson game:


Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Sheets

NSFW... Wowsers.

We were thinking that as well

Seriously. We just didn't write about it. But after seeing the gang at The Dagger mention it we changed our minds. What in sam hell are we talking about?

How on earth is North Carolina still ranked?

"But that doesn't mean UNC should still be ranked in
both the AP (No. 24) and coaches polls (No. 23) this
week. If a .667 winning percentage, losses in three of
the last five games and a sub-.500 ACC mark were the
stuff of ranked teams, then North Carolina State should
be getting votes too."

This is what we call the Duke Effect. Name brand recognition makes pollsters give team mulligan after mulligan. We would really love to sit down in a room with one of these voters to get their thinking about this.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Everyone saw THAT coming

And then there was one

Kansas State beats Texas 71 to 62. Texas fans take out their frustration on the internets.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Could a record deal be next?

Besides beating top ranked teams, Tennessee players have other talents as well. Like smoothed out R&B crooning. Introducing guard Renaldo Woolridge:

Shortay stop trippin', baby girl I'll never leave you like Kiffen...

True dat.


Mike Krzyzewski is the devil

There are a few of us here who feel Wake Forest should have won that game. Not that we are Duke haters, far from the truth. We are actually criticizing the Demon Deacons here. The turnover rate against the Blue Devils was amazing (can we get some stats on this?).

What about the Plumlee brothers blah blah blah.

Yeah, what about Wake's Al-Farouq Aminu's double double?

They were matching them shot per shot but then they got sloppy. Now we know coach Dino Gaudio prepares his kids better than that. And if he does then we need to think that coach K had an unfair advantage...

Or coach Gaudio sucks in big games.

You choose.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Pop quiz, hot shot

If you're Notre Dame forward Luke Harangody and some punk foolishly takes you down Greco-Roman style, what do you do?

What do you do...?

Welcome to basket. Balls.

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Change of plans

We know you have heard us say over and over again we are not fans of women's basketball. Their style of play is very foreign to us, not agressive at all. A lot of perimeter shooting and very little battles in the paint. But they're girls, why should we expect them to fight like men underneath the basket. Anywho, we are going to watch undefeated UConn and undefeated Notre Dame gals b-ball tonight. The battle for first place in women's NCAA college basketball. We have no predictions because this is new to us.

So join us. We are gonna rock out to Lady Gaga during halftime and enjoy the game!

Good luck, ladies. Awww, so cute!

And besides, we LOVE Notre Dame's head coach's name. Muffet McGraw. That just rocks the house.

They are in shock

Wow, we realize that the Tar Heels were reeling but not to this extent.

CHAPEL HILL - North Carolina had the Will to win Saturday. It just wasn't enough.

Despite overcoming a 20-point first half deficit and getting 24 points from junior Will Graves, the Tar Heels lost to Georgia Tech 73-71 when Graves' last-ditch try at a game-winner with 1.7 seconds left fell short.

The Tar Heels, coming off the worst margin of defeat in the Roy Williams era, at Clemson last Wednesday, got eaten up by guard Iman Shumpert (17) and by their own mistakes (11 turnovers, minus-3 rebounding) in the first half.

Yellow Jackets, you deserve more than our usual This Is Sparta! award. To go into The Dean and get that win, that deserves something more. You get our rare MOTHERFUCKER award...

Ya hear that nerds? That's for you!

Lessons in lazy cheerleading

Observed during the West Virginia / Syracuse game...

Gabby: Are the West Virginia Cheerleaders wearing shoes?
Dave: I don't know.
Gabby: I don't think they are wearing shoes.
Dave: Well, it is West fuckin' Virginia.
Gabby: Country, man. Pure country.

What you got?

These dudes is monsters, man. I mean if they can't watch it, blog it, or laugh about it they don't want it.

Syracuse at West Virginia - Noon
Penn St. at Iowa - 1:05 pm
Georgia Tech at North Carolina (game of interest) - 2 pm
Notre Dame at Cincinnati - 4 pm
Virginia Tech at Florida St - 6 pm
Saint Joseph's at St. Bonaventure - 7 pm battle of the saints!
Gonzaga at San Diego (game of interest) - 9 pm

Georgetown at Villanova (game of interest) - Noon
Wake Forest at Duke - 8 pm

Our viewing schedule will also include copious amounts of wine and seafood. So throw your hands up and keep rolling (rolling rolling rolling).

Friday, January 15, 2010

Give a little bit

A responsible global citizen means donating to help the Haitian earthquake recovery effort. We did it, you can too.

Docs Without Borders


Go education!

See this man?

Get to know him.

Love him.

For he speaks the truth:

ATLANTA -- Education Secretary Arne Duncan criticized and says college basketball is hurt by players who enter the NBA after only one season at his keynote speech at the NCAA convention Thursday.

Now that just makes our pie holes smile. Can we float a rumor that Duncan is running for NCAA president?

San Francisco Days

Quick, who's the best team in the Pac-10?


We don't blame you. The Pacific 10 conference is a joke right now. Unfortunately the pollsters aren't laughing. AP voters decided they'd had enough this week, snubbing the Pac-10 for the first time since late February 1987:

"(The conference is) turning into an Abbott and Costello skit of double entendre, exploding cigars and backside falls down staircases."

Catch it! And Happy Friday.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Tar Heels: Best school in the nation

Listen to the man, North Carolina. The pollsters will...

Best line: "Y'all got the Rodney King beat out of you!"

So wear your baby blue paper bags over your heads UNC fans. You've earned it!

The view was nice

Wow. Look at that. It's us!

Ouch. We get to this point every season where we just can't watch anymore. Hey, SDSU may get into the NCAA Tournament but we are not going to follow it much now.

Groundhog Day. The Aztecs had the lead against UNLV but blew it in the 2nd half losing 66 to 76.

Just call us Charlie Brown.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Fun with rankings

The AP Top 25 Poll this week:

What about the teams ranked 21-25? What about them...

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Alabama fan

NSFW... You have been warned.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010


Can't believe this skipped by us but Dartmouth coach Terry Dunn resigned on Friday.

"So?" you say. "Big whoop". "Ivy League, who cares" right?

Well, normally we would agree but in this case it was the reason why he resigned:

Dartmouth men's basketball coach Terry Dunn was forced to resign after his entire team threatened to boycott taking the court this weekend.

Each player signed a document that was taken to the administration on Friday stating they refused to play for Dunn.

I guess with a 47-103 overall record the kids were fed up.

*play Price is Right Fail horn here*

Monday, January 11, 2010

Scene: Inside the Thompson-Boling Arena

You bring the crowns and heads of conquered coaches to my campus. You insult Pat. You threaten my players with yet another loss! Oh, I've chosen my words carefully, Bill. Perhaps you should have done the same!

This is blasphemy! This is madness!

Madness...? This is SPARTA!!!

Congrats on taking down the #1 ranked unbeaten team. Now we are down to two.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Xavier on top

...only with dudes

What was really impressive about the George Washington / Xavier contest was how the Colonials were physically beating Xavier and the Musketeers mustered enough to rally in the final 2 minutes of the game to win 76 to 69. Don't believe us? Look at this chart!

What the freak?

So yes, George Washington wins the ABC award this week. Wasn't there a movie made about what the Colonials did?

Welcome to day two

Scrambled eggs with bits of fried chicken and hot sauce.
Perfect hangover food.

What you got?

Irrational Exuberance

Be careful of your celebrations...

It was an eventual bullshit call but it was called nonetheless. And Purdue knows who they are. They are the unbeaten team that beat another unbeaten team that just got beat. < /Tropic Thunder reference>

Saturday, January 9, 2010

We must protect this (premature) seeding!

We must beat UNLV this Wednesday. After they beat New Mexico, our win against them means nothing. Our win against Wyoming means nothing.

It doesn't even matter now. Good job guys.

Picture Pages: Georgetown edition

That was as gritty a game as we've seen so far...

Hoyas, you are sexy beasts!

Nothing goes better with a Georgetown win than beer and my kid!

How many times have we said Dickie V is annoying?

Currently watching UConn/Georgetown and Dick Vitale just said:

"I think the best guard tandem in college basketball is Scheyer and Nolan Smith!"

Geee, we wonder why?

Good morning, America!!!

Did you miss us? With college football officially done the focus is now on the greatest sport evah! We'll be updating you throughout the weekend with pics, vids and comments from the games. Our drink of choice? Chardonnay. Because that's how we roll. The viewing schedule is as follows:

UConn at Georgetown (game of interest) - Noon
Purdue at Wisconsin - 1:30 pm
Marquette at Villanova (game of interest) - 2 pm
UNLV at New Mexico - 4 pm
Georgia at Kentucky - 4 pm
San Diego State at Wyoming (game of interest) - 6 pm
West Virginia at Notre Dame - 8 pm

Temple at Rhode Island - 1 pm
Kansas at Tennessee (game of interest) - 4:30 pm
Virginia Tech at UNC - 7:45 pm

Bench press Asian women and stay thirsty, my friends.

Friday, January 8, 2010

Let's get some shoes

Between the mythical "National Championship" game last night, work and date night with the wives tonight we really haven't had time to post anything substantial. So we leave you with fluff.

Guys, are you struggling to understand your fuck buddy, girlfriend, wife? Watch this:

Ignore the fact that the girl is a boy. Who like boys to be girls.

Happy Friday. We'll catch you on the flip side.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

A little trigger happy

C'mon, Cornell's good but...

Kansas got taken to the limit by Cornell yesterday, finally rallying to win 71 to 66. Yes, Cornell is good. Maybe great. But after one game to say they deserve the Ivy League conference auto bid or an at-large bid for the NCAA Tournament?!

What about Harvard? Yes, the Harvard with star guard Jeremy Lin. The Harvard universally predicted to get the auto bid. Cornell taking an at-large with the teams they play in and out of conference? Ummmm...


Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Funny girl

Technically SFW... NOT

Spit take

"Just waking up in the morning gotta thank God
I don't know but today seems kinda odd
No barking from the dogs, no smog
And SDSU stomped the Lobos like a frog"

"I told our team if the NCAA tournament started yesterday, New Mexico would be in as a four or five seed, BYU would be in and Vegas would be in, and we'd be the little stepchild knocking on the door and nodding."
- San Diego State coach Steve Fisher

So yes, our Aztecs beat 15th ranked New Mexico 74 to 64. Can we please for the love of all that is holy keep this momentum going into March? Pretty please?

Tuesday, January 5, 2010


Yes, we know about College of Charleston beating UNC. And yes, we know about the sanctions against USC. We just were not all that taken by the news and hey other blogs/mainstream media are talking about it.

We'll concentrate on other things. Like why Oklahoma State coach Travis Ford feels that being arrested for drug use is no big deal on his team.


He doesn't like us in that way

UCLA defector Drew Gordon feels that San Diego State would be too much like UCLA, decides to go with the winners at New Mexico.

(Gordon) visited San Diego State last week and was at Viejas Arena for the Aztecs' 58-53 victory over UC Riverside on Tuesday.

"New Mexico basketball seems like the perfect fit for me," Gordon told the Mercury News.

That speaks volumes right there.

Monday, January 4, 2010


Yes, we did that title for more page hits. Perverts. What's so special about Asian women?!

Anyways, Jeremy Lin, the star player on Harvard's squad is Asian American. And some people might not be so thrilled about that:

In the U.S., basketball stars are African-Americans first, Caucasians second, and Asians. . . somewhere far down the line. People can't look past his ethnicity. Everywhere he plays, Lin is the target of cruel taunts.

"It's everything you can imagine," (Lin) says. "Racial slurs, racial jokes, all having to do with being Asian." According to Harvard teammate Oliver McNally, another Ivy League player called him a c-word that rhymes with "ink" during a game last season. Just last week, during Harvard's 86-70 loss to Georgetown in Washington, D.C., McNally says one spectator yelled "sweet and sour pork" from the stands.

Wow dude, we don't know how you can take that night after night. We would have been getting technical after technical for the beatdowns we would give those rubes. Don't know how he does it.

"He gets pissed about it afterwards," says McNally. "I have to tip my hat to him. I don't know how I'd react. The type of dude I am, I might not be as mature as Jeremy."


Sunday, January 3, 2010

Fresh out on bail out of jail Tennessee dreaming

Que pasa?!

Like we promised, we were gonna keep you updated on this...

KNOXVILLE - Four University of Tennessee basketball players remain free on bond today, a day after their arrests on drug and weapons charges when a Knoxville police officer stopped the car they were riding in for speeding on Alcoa Highway near Kingston Pike.

Inside the vehicle, according to DeBusk, officers found a handgun under the driver’s seat, "accessible by either the driver or left rear seat passenger." They also found a handgun, with an altered serial number under the passenger seat, accessible by either the front seat passenger or right rear seat passenger, according to DeBusk. They also found a baggy of marijuana and an open container of alcohol.

All in all it was a total of $7,000 bond. And indefinite suspension. And the possible loss of scholarships. And the possible expulsion from school. And the taint of being criminals. All for pot. And booze.

Good job!

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Yes, sir

Finally a game where Kentucky's John Wall did not single-handedly win, but it was a game that he changed the momentum with Kentucky finally beating Louisville 71 to 62. We were somewhat worried how the game started (if you didn't see it, click here for an artist's interpretation of those moments) with the fights and the technicals being thrown around.

But give the si, senor salute nod to Wall for this play:

Geez. We hate you one-and-done rule.

Say what?

Who's house? Gonzaga's house!

How could Syracuse lose that game?

Syracuse dominated that first half! WWL, can we have a chart?

Look at that. The Orange demonstrated why they were the 5th ranked team in the country. Pitt was out rebounded, out hustled, out shot, basically any phase of the game you can think of the Panthers were out classed. Then the second half happened...

And there you go. Pittsburgh was allowed to come back and impose their will. This then broke the will of Syracuse, eventually falling 72 to 82.

Always be closing? We're not giving that to the Orange but damn. What happened?

Friday, January 1, 2010

You can't spell thug without the UT

Lesson number one: If you are getting pulled over during a traffic stop, hide the weed!

KNOXVILLE, Tenn. (AP) — Four Tennessee basketball players, including starting senior forward Tyler Smith, are facing felony gun and misdemeanor drug charges.

Tyler Smith, Cameron Tatum, Brian Williams and Melvin Goins were arrested after a traffic stop around noon on Friday.

According to a police report, officers smelled marijuana coming from the car and found a handgun with an altered serial number, a bag of marijuana and an open container of alcohol. Tatum was driving.

All kinds of fail going on with this shit. We'll keep you posted.

Put your money where your mouth is: A M2M Liveblog

A few days ago we said this: "Purdue will beat West Virginia on New Year's Day". Were we bold? Stupid? Well join us and find out today!

UPDATE: We told you so...