Showing posts with label NSFW. Show all posts
Showing posts with label NSFW. Show all posts

Thursday, March 3, 2011

The whole story on Brandon Davies dismissal from BYU



Scene: Monday evening, February 28th around 8:45 pm in Provo, UT. BYU forward Brandon Davies is walking home from the school library. An unassuming gentleman with a short sleeve white shirt and black tie approaches...

Unassuming gentleman: "Hey, you're Brandon Davies!"
Davies: "Yes."
Unassuming gentleman: "Cool, great win against San Diego State! You guys swept them."
Davies: "Yeah, thanks man."
Unassuming gentleman: "Your rebounds and assists were crucial in that game. You kept the momentum from swinging to those guys."
Davies: "Yeah. We were just working hard against a real good team."
Unassuming gentleman (extending hand to shake): "Indeed! By the way, my name is Marcus. Pleasure to meet you. I'm a big fan of yours."
Davies (reciprocates handshake): "Nice to meet you... Wait, did you say you're a fan of mine?"
Marcus: "Yes!"
Davies: "What about Jimmer?"
Marcus: "Yeah, he is good too. But I am a student of the game and I know that without a great supporting cast he would not be all that. Plus I like the unsung heroes."
Davies: "Wow, thanks a lot. I appreciate that."
Marcus: "No problem. Hey, I have a friend that I would like you to meet."
(A mysterious woman appears from the bushes wearing a long buttoned up brown trench coat. Davies recognizes her immediately.)
Davies: "Uhhhhh, that's my girlfriend. Hey honey, why are you dressed like that?"
Marcus: "Oh, she has a present for you. To celebrate your win."
Davies: "Honey, how do you know this guy?"
Girlfriend: "Brandon baby, this is for you. I think it's time now."
(She unbuttons her coat and exposes herself to the chilly night air)
Davies (jaw drops): "What. The. Fuuuuuu..."
Marcus: "Yes sir."
Davies: "Honey, you know we can't do that. The Code and all."
Marcus: "Aw, come on. She's a Black man's kryptonite! A White girl with a big booty. We call 'em PAWGs around my area. How you resisted for so long amazes me. Just let yourself go, no one is looking."
Davies: "Uhhhhhh....."
Girlfriend: "Take me, take me now Brandon!"
(Davies almost uncontrollably grabs her luscious rear end and starts kissing her. Amazingly, BYU's Athletic Director Tom Holmoe just happens to strolls by)
Holmoe: "What is going on here?! Mr. Davies, you know how seriously we take the Honor Code."
Davies: "But but but..."
Holmoe: "I will need to have a talk with coach Rose about this."

Brandon looks around for help but unable to find any as Marcus and Davies' girlfriend have run off. The only thing that he sees is a crumpled game program on the ground that says "SDSU - BYU, Saturday, February 26th @ Viejas Arena" on it.

fin.



Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Your (First and Last) Wednesday Moment of Zen

Editor's note: For the past three or four years we have been doing these Wednesday cheesecake photos just for shits and giggles. We admit it was gimmicky and mainly used to attract readers. But now we have lost the interest in doing them. So below will be the first of the season and the last of the series. If you start to have withdraw symptoms later there is always Google. Enjoy.

March to Madness presents... Come and knock on our doors.



Here's to the start of college basketball season! NSFW, y'all.



Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Jobs



Economically NSFW. 50 cents is a good deal!



Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

Click here for more sex and basketball content for free!


A donation from you will ensure we keep this free site up and running!









March to Madness presents... Can you take my picture?


You know NSFW. I won't remember (click on picture for full view).



Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Beer (not Bear)



Doh! NSFW. Bad tasting beer too.



Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Bear



Aw, NSFW. How cute! And dangerous.



Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Jackie's Party



Oh yeah, NSFW. Cups not included.



Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Snow



Don't be fooled, NSFW. From one of our favorite bloggers, Ms. Jen.



Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Sunbathing



Kind of NSFW. Taken at SDSU!



Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Wine



NSFW. Makes you do crazy things...



Thursday, March 4, 2010

The game you should have been watching



Yeah, that happened.

1) Kansas State 65, Kansas 82

Although it was well documented how no one would be able to see this game, it didn't stop us. A number one seed was at stake with two hot teams battling it out. Unfortunately one team got mercilessly purified in the waters of Lake Minnetonka (NSFW).


Aw, you'll get us next time big guy

Kansas State hung tough with Kansas for the first half as the game quickly became a "who can foul out first" fest. Sherron Collins was a non factor for the Jayhawks while the Wildcats Jacob Pullen had somewhat of a mediocre game. The true ass rape came off of the Jayhawks bench in the second half. The announcers were shocked that they could do that to the Wildcats...



Oh yeah, Maryland beat Duke too.



Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Trapped



NSFW. That looks like it hurts...



Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Big



No, NSFW. But it really is big!



Saturday, February 20, 2010

Maybe we shouldn't breathe so much



NSFW, from a cinematic point of view...

Our viewing schedule:

SATURDAY
North Carolina at Boston College - Noon
Tennessee vs. the Downey Ball - 1:30 pm
Texas at Texas Tech (game of interest) - 2 pm
Virginia at Clemson - 4 pm
Kansas St. at Oklahoma - 6 pm
Kentucky at Vanderbilt (game of interest) - 6 pm

SUNDAY
Villanova at Pittsburgh (game of interest) - Noon
Virginia Tech at Duke - 7:45 pm

Unfortunately that will not be us after watching the games today and tomorrow. Real life intrudes throughout this weekend and we need to keep our wits about us. But don't let that stop you. Have a drink for us.



Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Whoops



Hey, NSFW... If you look close enough.



Saturday, February 13, 2010

You bastard

This is the very definition of a cock tease (NSFW):




Why, why do you do that to us, Cort?! We count on your sage advice and you give us this? We know San Diego State will blow it and even if they don't the committee will notice that we have only one quality road win (New Mexico) this year.



Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Shaving



Seriously NSFW... Some might find this disturbing.



Saturday, January 23, 2010

Hello, Kitty




Our viewing schedule:

SATURDAY
Michigan State at Minnesota (game of interest) - Noon
Boston College at Virginia Tech - 1:30 pm
Marquette at Syracuse - 2 pm
DePaul at Notre Dame - 2 pm
Arkansas at Kentucky - 4 pm
Texas at UConn - 4 pm
Dayton at St. Joseph's - 6 pm
St. Bonaventure at Duquesne - 7 pm

SUNDAY
Pittsburgh at Seton Hall (game of interest) - 2 pm

So take care of that morning wood and get yer game on. Oklahoma's Lesli Jones ought to do it for ya (Not Safe For Anything). That's right, we like our women voluptuous, bushy or both.



Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Sheets



NSFW... Wowsers.



Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Your Wednesday Moment of Zen

March to Madness presents... Behold, ME!



View at work only if you hate your job