Monday, November 3, 2008

Satire, defined

IMAGINATIONLAND, NC -- On the heels of his historic unanimous selection to the AP preseason All-American team -- in which he received one vote from every single one of 72 voters -- and his team's unanimous No. 1 preseason ranking, Tyler Hansbrough was selected Monday to the NBA All-Star Team and the Baseball and Football Halls of Fame, the Real World/Road Rules veterans squad, Survivor All-Stars, and as Dick Vitale's first ever lifetime captain of the P-T-P'ers.

He was also awarded top honors on every Bravo game show, including Top Chef and Project Runway; was given the Pulitzer and Nobel Prizes for "Excellence in Basketball"; received the McArthur Genius Grant; and was elected, in a last-minute runoff landslide, to the Presidency of the United States of America.

Hansbrough is currently recovering from a shin injury that should sideline him for a few weeks. His shin was named "Awesomest Shin Ever" by the North Carolina University Hospital medical staff.


From the most excellent blog The Dagger.



1 comments:

Unknown said...

I won't jump on the UNC bandwagon because March makes matters interesting for any team--no matter how many pre-season or in-season polls point to a top billing.

I do hope Hansbrough recovers quickly though so we can all see if they match the hype.

-Peter Robert Casey